IRC-Galleria

Get out of my head. Leave me alone. Why did you turn into these nighmares. Why do I feel like everything is going straight to the hell but I don't know why. Am I crying for nothing? Am I seeking something else? Nobody cares. they just think that "Ou, he will be just alright". Well I'm not! But I don't just know what's wrong. If I knew earlier, I wouldn't probably even be in this situation. That's the difference. All I ever wanted was just support when I had harsh times. But I made you run away from me. I don't blame you. I blame me. Because of my stupidity and selfishness I'm now grying on the floor, begging for God to help me. But I hear no answer. Everybody hates me , even God. What's worth of living if every thing reminds me of you, every minute takes pieces from inside until there is nothing left. Only an empty soul if even that. I'm crying for help and nobody seems to hear me. Please, help me before I tear myself apart. I'll tell you everything.

" I am losing you again
let me out and let me in
'cause you're not alone here
not at all
let me belong here
break my fall "

You don't even recognize me anymore. I'm like some kind of ghost. I'm circlering you around and you don't even look at me. I didn't saw any sadness like mine in your eyes. You don't give me any attention. I would like to talk to you but I'm too afraid. I fear that I would say something that would hurt you or make me in bad light in your eyes.

So many tears for what? Just to see you happy. Why? It seems it doesn't hurt you at all. Is that really possible? Could it be?

On asioita joita toisen/toisten olis hyvä tietää mut niiden kertominen saattais loukata niitä tai jotakuta muuta ja on asioita jotka ois hyvä tietää mut nekin saattais vaan loukata jotakuta.

Vaikka kuinka haluis sanoo jollekkin mikä on vaivannu itteensä kauan ni ei vaan voi koska se/ne toinen/toiset vois nauraa päin naamaa ja pitää toista ihan epätoivosena. ehkä se oliskin ihan oikeutettuu. Mut oisko se hirveen itsekästä mennä vaan kertoon sellasii juttui jotka kuitenki koskettaa toista/toisia jollakin tavalla? Entä pitäiskö se asia perustella jotenki vai voisko sen vaan pamauttaa tosta vaan?

Se olis niin helppoo mut ei niin kai voi tehä. Vaikka se itteensä sattuiski ni toista pitää suojella totuudelta...


" You're so cold, but you feel alive
lay your hands on me one last time

Show me how it end it's alright
show me how defenseless you really are
satisfy an empty inside
that's alright, let's give this another try "

Missähän kaikki on...


" Look who's alone now
it's not me. It's not me
those three Wise Men,
they've got a semi by the sea
got to ask yourself the question
where are you now? "

Great to have you back ^^




" Time is a valuable thing
watch it fly by as the pendulum swings
watch it count down to the end of the day
the clock ticks life away
it's so unreal
didn't look out below
watch the time go right out the window
trying to hold on but didn't even know
wasted it all just to
watch you go
I kept everything inside and even though I tried it all fell apart
what I meant to me will eventually be a memory of
a time when I tried
so hard "

Pitäis varmaan käydä jollain lekuril ku saattaapi olla niin et oon periny masennuksen faijalta :S I didn't know that was possible :S. Verikokeis pitäis käydä kans varmaan...

I can see me dying. Every time I look at the mirror I feel like something is dying inside me, burning away in shame. It won't never come back, even how hard I would try. Piece after piece falling away until there is nothing left. But atleast I would be gone then, forgotten to the winds of time. Nobody wouldn't remember, nobody wouldn't miss. You would just continue your life without me and you wouldn't even notice it.

" Things aren't the way they were before
You wouln't even recognize me anymore
Not that you knew me back then
But it all comes back to me in the end

You kept everything inside and even though I tried it all fell apart
What I ment to me will eventually be a memory of a time when I tried so hard "

I wish this all could be just a nightmare and when I wake up all would be alright again. but it won't.

Käytiin Sampan kaa kattoos uus Pirates of Caribbean. Ihan ok.

(P.S eikö elämäni olekkin tylsää kun mitään muuta ei koko päivänä tapahtunut)

" Tosta hyvästä vedetään kölin ali! " XD

Tultiin just faijan kaa mökiltä. Mentiin veneellä hirveessä aallokossa. Ei oo ikinä pelottanu niin paljoo :S. Takasin ei viittiny enää veneellä tulla ku oli aallokko taas vähän voimakkaampi ni pummittiin sedältä kyyti :D.
Viime yönä istuttiin faijan kaa rannalla ja puheltiin kaikkee " isä-poika" skeidaa :)
Sai se mut sitten jopa juomaan pari olutta...