IRC-Galleria

Ohjeet koirille ja kissoilleTiistai 23.10.2007 17:08

Rakkaat koirat ja kissat,

Astiat, joissa on tassunkuvia ovat teidän ja sisältävät teidän ruokaanne.
Muut astiat ovat minun ja ne sisältävät minun ruokaani. Huomioikaa, että
tassunjäljen asettaminen keskelle ateriaani ei tee siitä teidän ruokaanne.
En myöskään pidä tassunkuvaa ruokani keskellä esteettisesti miellyttävänä.

Porraskäytävää eivät suunnitelleet F1-insinöörit, eikä se ole kilparata.
Minun päihittäminen alaspäin juoksussa ei ole tavoitteena.
Kampittamiseni ei auta, koska kaadun alas nopeammin, kuin te juoksette.

En voi ostaa mitään jättisänkyä suurempaa. Tästä olen erittäin pahoillani.
Älkää luulko, että jatkan sohvalla nukkumista varmistaakseni
teidän hyvän olonne. Koirat ja kissat voivat oikeasti käpertyä pieneksi
palloksi nukkuessaan. Ei ole tarpeellista nukkua vaakatasossa muihin nähden
levittäytyneenä mahdollisimman pitkäksi.
Tiedän myös että hännän pitkäksi venyttäminen ja kielen ulkona roikottaminen
tilankäytön maksimoinniksi ei ole enää muuta kuin sarkasmia.

Viimeisen kerran, kylpyhuoneessa ei ole salakäytävää eikä taikaovia.
Jos jonkin ihmeen kaupalla ehdin sinne ennen teitä ja onnistun
saamaan oven kiinni, eivät raapiminen, vinkuminen, naukuminen,
ovenkahvan kääntö, tassun oven ali saaminen, tai muutkaan temput, ei ole tarpeellisia.
Minun täytyy tulla ulos samasta ovesta, kuin josta menin sisään.
Lisäksi, olen käyttänyt WC:tä useita vuosia
-- kissa-tai koiraeläinten avustus ko. tapahtumassa ei ole tarpeellista.

Oikea järjestys on: Suudelkaa minua ENSIN, sitten voitte mennä
haistelemaan toisen koiran tai kissan takapuolta. Tätä en voi painottaa
riittävästi.

Vastapalvelukseksi teille, rakkaat lemmikkini, olen liimannut etuoveemme
seuraavan viestin: Kaikille ei-lemmikin omistajille, jotka haluavat käydä
kylässä ja silti valittaa eläimistämme:

1. He asuvat täällä. Sinä et.

2. Jos et halua heidän karvojaan vaatteillesi, pysy poissa
huonekaluista.

3. Pidän lemmikeistäni enemmän, kuin monista ihmisistä.

4. Sinulle lemmikkini on eläin. Minulle hän on adoptoitu
poika/tytär, joka on lyhyt, karvainen, kävelee neljällä jalalla ja puhuu
hieman epäselvästi

Miau..Torstai 20.09.2007 01:53

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Auta kissaa valloittamaan Irc-Galleria
Lisäämällä tämä sinun päiväkirjaasi

Tylsää(kö)?Lauantai 18.08.2007 20:18

[x] Sammunut
[x] Itkenyt ja nauranut samaan aikaan
[x] Sairastanut angiinaa
[ ] Ollut merisairas
[x] Leikkinyt barbeilla yli 12-vuotiaana
[x] Omistanut monta laatikollista leluja
[x] Laulanut suihkussa kovaa
[x] Tehnyt runoja
[x] Tehnyt novelleja
[ ] Voittanut juoksukilpailun
[ ] Ollut helikopterissa
[ ] Käynyt Espanjassa
[ ] Ollut pommisuojassa
[ ] Juossut 5 kilometriä putkeen
[x] Lyönyt jotain
[ ] Ollut kiusaaja
[x] Poistettu luokasta
[x] Saanut kokeesta 5-
[x] Haukkunut opettajaa
[x] Omistanut yli 1000 euroa
[x] Omistanut vain yhdet käyttökelpoiset sukat
[x] Haaveillut salaa
[ ] Omistanut 3 kännykkää samaan aikaan
[x] Paennut lemmikkiä
[/] Joutunut sairaalaan
[ ] Ollut poliisiautossa
[ ] Jäänyt kiinni varastelusta
[x] Ollut ulkona yli neljään yöllä
[x] Valvonut yli 30 tuntia putkeen
[ ] Juonut viikon putkeen
[ ] Repinyt rahaa
[ ] Heittänyt kännykän veteen
[ ] Ollut rakastunut
[ ] Penkonut roskiksia
[ ] Ollut suossa
[x] Ajanut autoa
[x] Ajanut ryteikköön pyörällä
[x] Hyppinyt trampoliinilla
[/] Tuhonnut äidin meikkejä
[x] Heittänyt hyvää ruokaa roskiin
[ ] Ollut häissä yli neljä kertaa
[x] Omistanut nokkahuilun
[x] Soittanut pianoa
[ ] Ollut musikaalissa
[ ] Nähnyt ufon
[x] Pelännyt sukulaista
[x] Ollut koneella yli 10 tuntia putkeen
[ ] Pitänyt lintua sormella
[ ] Tanssinut salsaa
[x] Kuullut harhoja
[x] Piirtänyt ruumiita
[ ] Säveltänyt laulun
[ ] Jäänyt luokalle
[ ] Käynyt nollaluokan
[ ] Käynyt kymppiluokan
[x] Eksynyt tutussa paikassa
[ ] Kutsunut esim. opettajaa äidiksi
[x] Haukkunut jotain, ja tämä on kuullut sen vahingossa
[/] Ollut töissä
[ ] Ollut kympinoppilas
[x] Ollut nelosenoppilas
[ ] Sairastan astmaa
[ ] Allerginen yli kuudelle asialle
[x] Inhoan kutittelua
[ ] Rakastan kipua
[ ] Jos minua pelottaa, niin alan hyräillä
[x] Perhe on minulle tärkeä

10 tapaa lievittää stressiäPerjantai 20.07.2007 18:26

1. Tuijota ihmisiä haarukan läpi ja kuvittele, että he ovat
vankilassa.

2. Laita liikkeelle ilkeä juoru ja yritä tunnistaa se, kun se
tulee uudelleen kohdallesi.

3. Täytä veroilmoituksesi käyttämällä roomalaisia numeroita.

4. Mene lounasaikaan istumaan autoosi ja osoittele ohi ajavia
tukankuivaajalla.

5. Laita työpaikan kahviautomaattiin kofeiinitonta kahvia kolmen viikon ajan.
Kun kaikki vapisevat rauniot ovat päässet irti addiktioistaan,
täytä automaatti tuplaespressolla.

6. Hyppele aina kun voit.

7. Kysy ihmisiltä mitä sukupuolta he edustavat.

8. Levitä hyttysverkko työpisteesi ylle.

9. Ilmoita lapsillesi ruokapöydässä että taloudellisen tilanteesi
takia yksi heistä joutuu lähtemään.

10. Ja kaiken huipennukseksi: lähetä tämä kaikille ihmisille
joiden osoite sinulla on, huolimatta siitä että he ovat kieltäneet lähettämästä
roskapostia.

^_^Keskiviikko 18.07.2007 14:59

Meni sit se inssiki läpi.. :)

Tylsää..?Sunnuntai 08.07.2007 00:19

Klikkaa kymmenen satunnaista galleriasta ja laita niiden oletuksen kuvatekstit numeroiduille paikoille klikkailu järjestyksessä heittomerkkien väliin.

1. Heräsin tänään aamulla ja totesin: "Tykkään ku kuvaat"
2. Toistelin: "Oikeesti etin vaa sitä yhtä oikeet. Amorin nuolet viuhuu ohi muttei osu muhun, puhu puhu ehkä mä ihastun just suhun."
3. Sanoin luokkatoverilleni: "VOI VITTU,MIKKO!!!!!!!!"
4. Sitten piti tehdä: "RaiRaiHalooHaloo"
5. Joka kerta kun oon kotona sanon: "Hihi. <3<3 My only one <3"
6. Vaihdan ehkä oletuskuvani tekstiksi: "mielentilahäiriö"
7. Oon saletisti: "fiiliksis:)ja joku apina tua taustalla:D"
8. Kiljasin eilen kaupungilla: "hirmuunen peto"
9. Ensivuoden tuleva mottoni on: "Se kieli SAATTAA mennä epävireeseen kun sille tekee nuin... "
10. Viimeiset sanani tulevat olemaan: "hyvä hetki"

Joo'o.. ^_^

No..Torstai 21.06.2007 23:14

Muistatko sinä, joka juuri luet tätä tekstiä ja tunnet minut (esim. omistat puhelinnumeroni, olet paras kaverini, olet joskus jutellut kanssani jne.) miten tapasimme? Minä muistan (ehkä!) mutta muistatko sinä? Ole kiltti ja kommentoi että tiedän sinun muistelleen meidän kaveruuttamme :)

Sinä, joka kommentoit (tai luit tätä) kopioi tämä omalle sivullesi ja ylläty siitä, miten moni sinut muistaakaan!

^_^Tiistai 19.06.2007 16:55

Kirjalliset meni ekal läpi, turhaa hermoilin.. :)

Puhelin-juttu..Perjantai 08.06.2007 15:47

Puhelin voi paljastaa yllättäviä asioita.
Vastaa rehellisesti: millä nimellä esiinnyn puhelimessasi?

Party, party!!Tiistai 29.05.2007 19:18

Happy birthday to me..