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florida bitchTorstai 22.03.2007 12:58

ONLY FLORIDIANS KNOW THIS...

"Down South" means The Keys

"Panhandling" means going to Pensacola.

You think no-one over 70 should be allowed to drive.

Flip-flops are everyday wear.

Shoes are for business meetings and church.

No, wait, flip flops are good for church too, unless it's Easter or
Christmas.

You have a flip-flop tan on your feet and its there to stay

Sweet tea can be served at any meal.

An alligator once walked through your neighborhood.

You smirk when a game show's "Grand Prize" is a trip or cruise to Florida.

You measure distance in minutes.

You have a drawer full of bathing suits, and one sweatshirt.

You get annoyed at the tourists who feed seagulls.

All the local festivals are named after a fruit.

A mountain is any hill 100 feet above sea level.

You think everyone from a bigger city has a northern accent.

You know the four seasons really are: almost summer, summer,
not summer but really hot, and Christmas.

It's not soda, cola, or pop...its coke, regardless of brand or flavor, "What kinda coke you want?"


Anything under 95 is just warm.

Anything under 70 is chilly.

You've hosted a hurricane party.

You go to a theme park for an afternoon, and know when to get on the best rides.


You pass on the right and honk at the elderly.

You understand the futility of exterminating cockroaches.(THEY NEVER GO AWAY!

You can pronounce Okeechobee, Kissimmee, Withlacoochee, Okahumpka, Opalocka and Loxahatchee.

You understand why it's better to have a friend with a boat, than have a boat yourself.

Bumper stickers on the pickup in front of you include: various fish, NRA, and a confederate flag.

You were 8 before you realized they made houses without pools.

You were 12 when you first met someone who couldn't swim.

You get angry when people say "Florida isn't really part of the SOUTH" -IT REALLY ISN'T THOUGH. ITS BELLOW THE THE SOUTH. THIS TROPICAL SOUTH, HAHA, NOT DIRTY SOUTH.

You've worn shorts and used the A/C on Christmas.

Socks are only for bowling

Orange juice from concentrate makes you vomit

Tap water makes you vomit

You never use an umbrella because you know the rain will be over in five minutes

A good parking place has nothing to do with distance from the store, but everything to do with shade.

Your winter coat is made of denim

You can tell the difference between fire ant bites and mosquito bites

You're younger than thirty but some of your friends are over 65

You've driven through Yeehaw Junction.

You could swim before you could read

You have to drive north to get to The South

You know that no other grocery store can compare to Publix.

Every other house had a blue roof in 2004-2005

You've gotten out of school early on Halloween to trick or treat before it got dark(and rainy)

You know that anything under a Category 3 just isn't worth waking up for.

You dread lovebug season.

You are on a first name basis with the Hurricane list. They aren't Hurricane Charley, Hurricane Frances...but Charley, Frances, Ivan and Jeanne.

You know what a snowbird is and you hate them.

You know why flamingos are pink.

You think a six-foot alligator is actually pretty average.

You were twelve before you ever saw snow or you still haven't.

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