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So: I heard u liek Mudkips?Torstai 01.01.2009 04:16

One day on Halloween, I decided to fuck with the major retard at school when I came out of science for break. He was dressed as Ash. Knowing this was going to happen, I brought a Mudkips doll. Thus I started the conversation, making sure no one saw me.

"So I heard you like Mudkips..."

"Mudkips? I LUUUUUUUUUUUURVE MUDKIPS."

"Well uh would you fuck a Mudki-"

"OF COURSE.

" happen to have a Mudkips here, and."

Before I finished the sentence, which would have resulted in me hitting him across the face with the doll, he grabbed it. In one swift motion his pants were down and he was violently humping it. Not to get between a man and his Mudkips, I started to walk away, because there is no way I'd be caught wrestling a half-naked crazy guy humping a Mudkips.

Needles to say, within 5 to 10 seconds, some girls saw him and started screaming. I cooly walked into a restroom, pretending nothing had ever happened; not that I had intended that outcome, but now that it was in play I didn't want to be involved.

I came back two minutes later, and like any wanton act on school grounds there was now a huge crowd round him. He was still fucking it and baying this real fucked up 'EEEEEEEEEEINNNNF EEEEEEEEEEINNNF' sound. Suddenly a scuffle broke out in the middle, meaning he probably did something stupid. I asked someone what had happened. A girlfriend of one of the football players tried to get him to stop, but he bit her for trying to take it away. Someone called in a few football players (all dressed up like Road Warrior) who proceeded to pummel the shit out of the guy. Meanwhile the school police were freaking out and having trouble getting in to the situation.

A few minutes later the intruder alarm went off and we were shuffled into classrooms. Over the intercom the principal announced that someone had thrown a flaming plush toy into the library. Uh.. what the hell.

So we were kept there and about 30 minutes later the principal came on again. This time he was saying that whoever was behind the beating should turn themselves in. All of a sudden this woman began yelling “I WILL SUE YOU FOR DAMAGES. YOU LITTLE PUNKS, I’M GONNA SUE…” and it was cut off.

I asked an office later what had happened. Apparently his mother had come to pick him up and threatened to sue for the beating and 'whatever else happened.' The school threatened to counter-sue because of lewd conduct, inciting a riot, and starting a fight.

So I ask you: do you like Mudkips?


[Ei aihetta]Keskiviikko 29.10.2008 19:30

hahhaa, vähä mä lollasin dösäs ku yks fruide sano kuskille lähtiessään ulos: "kiitti kyydist, veli"

aamupano, paras panoKeskiviikko 22.10.2008 13:43

Menin aamulla kattoo telkkarii sohvalle (Disney Channel ftw). En huomannu mun koiraa siel ku se nukku peiton alla. En istunu sen päälle (!!!) SItte se kömpi sielt ylös, tuijotteli hetken ympärillee ihan unisena, sit se koitti nylkyttää kaikkee mikä liikkuu :D You got a problem?

[Ei aihetta]Lauantai 13.09.2008 02:40

wafflesKeskiviikko 10.09.2008 21:09

I'm talkin' waffles
belgian or potatoe
waffles
lookin' at your plate now
do you have a waffle
wouldn't you be happier if you did

I'm talkin' waffles
belgian and potatoes
all kinds taste great
oh yes they do
'cause they're waffles
invented by Ghandi

why not keep some in handy
for a moments when you need

waffles, waffles, waffles,
wa-wa-wa-wa-waaaffleeees,
waafflees, waafflees, waaffllees

OwlsKeskiviikko 10.09.2008 20:54

Owls
everyone is fond of owls
except for mice and squirrels
and Simon Cowwells
and you know why they come for you

Owls in your dressing room
owls in the gravy
even if you hide 'n seek
there's owls in the navy

Simon Cowwell your days are numbered
owls will get you while you slumber
in the night they'll come for you
and tear your crazy legs into

coz your the king of the beavers
the king of the beavers
you cannot deceive us
and you can't fool owls
the king of the beavers
the king of the beavers
you cannot deceive
and you can't fool owls

BlimpKeskiviikko 10.09.2008 20:25

Everyone needs to get a blimp
coz blimps are pretty pimp
you can fill them up with air
but that won't get you anywhere

advertise upon the side
take your girlfriend for a ride
just fill up that balloon
with the very best gas in the toon

Helium
Helium
Helium

you need helium
to fill that bitch up
it's the second symbol
on the periodic table
oxygen and nitrogen
are far behind it
as chemicals go
they're both pretty stupid

Helium
Helium
Helium

Don't breath in though

Pork!Keskiviikko 10.09.2008 20:09

Pork it's the meat of kings
it's made from peatra
eat it with some onion rings
Pork chop goes with everything
'cause it's made from swine
and swine sure tastes fine

just bring some to the picnic, baby
you know you wanna' stuff it in my ham
but put these put it in some tupperware
'cause I don't wanna' be a porky hampster

let's talk about pork
converse about meat
veggies be vedgies
'cause pork beats veggies
ham's made of bacon,
pork you should taste them
I know it's surprising
but it's so appetizing